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If you’re on this page there is only one reason why you are
here: burning curiosity about what it takes to become a Fearless
Woman.
Do you catch yourself telling the same old stories about why
you can’t do something? There’s not enough money, not enough
relationship, my health isn’t good, I’m too old, too fat, too
tired. I used to dream about a future that was better, but that
was then, and this is reality. I can’t have it. I’m not capable,
I’m not worthy, I’m not good enough, I’m not qualified, I’m not
creative, I’m not, I’m not, I’m not. Is that the yadda yadda of
your life?
If so, you’re not alone. 99.9% of us have that conversation
almost daily.
You want to know how to eliminate the pain of bad choices that
has been plaguing your life, or you want to know how to make
better choices.
Oh, before I forget, … There’s no such thing as being Fearless.
There are only the decisions we all make to show up to it.
You see life is all about choices.
I’ll give you an example from my own life. I’ve been married
for 27 years and counting but it hasn’t always been easy.
Several years ago I was ready to divorce my husband. I blamed
him for all kinds of things, and I blamed him for creating the
life we were living. It was all his fault.
Until then, I’d always been good at blaming other people,
blaming circumstances and blaming the past for the present
predicament. I was ready to walk out on the marriage because I
blamed him for creating the limitations in our life. We were
constantly fighting about money, about where to live, and how to
live. I wanted one thing, he wanted another. And then one day,
in the midst of a huge fight, he said something quite profound
that I had not heard before.
He said “You made the choice to be with me!”
For some reason, that phrase slammed home. For the first time
in my life (and I was about 38 at the time) I truly understood
that we all make choices about where we want to be in life. I
had made my choice to be with him and whatever unhappiness I was
experiencing, it was my choice.
Choices are what dominate whether we have a good life, a bad
life or an okay life. We make decisions that seem right for the
moment, and frequently, there is an element of regret around the
choices. We wish we had thought about it more, had taken more
time to consider all the aspects, and had known what we know
now.
Did you ever hear the song No Regrets by Edith Piaf. She was
known as ‘Sparrow; because she was 4 feet something, a national
icon in France she captured the hearts of millions of people all
over the world with her voice. Her life was a tragedy of bad
marriages, bad decisions and eventually alcoholism and morphine
addiction that killed her. She made the wrong choices. Did she
have regrets? You bet she did. So did Judy Garland and Billie
Holiday. The world stage is strewn with people who made bad
choices that affected their lives. And there’s a simple reason
for that.
You see we build stories in our minds to lend credibility to
our position. When you believe you’re no good, then you’ll
literally create the life around that. All of these women above
inherently believed they were flawed. A teacher in school tells
you you’re useless so many times you believe it, and years
later, when you’ve forgotten the teacher, there’s a little part
of your unconscious that says you will never amount to much. So
you go out of your way to create situations that allow you to
continue living that story.
We are all full of stories. Stories from our past, stories we
tell ourselves, stories that other people tell us, and the
stories are the things that pull us down because we believe
them.
I’ll be you can give me an example of negative stories you
heard about yourself in the past that you believe to be true.
So how do you change the stories? Well, it’s easy. You start
changing the stories by telling yourself that they are stories.
We all believe in a happy ending, don’t we? Right!
Stories are language pictures. When we change the language we
change the picture. Can you ‘see’ how that would be? Change the
language and you change the picture. The way we think about
ourselves is critical to becoming a Fearless Woman. We make
choices based on how we perceive ourselves. It took me a long
time to figure this out, but when I did, it was so simple.
If I tell myself I’m a Magnificent Woman, I become one. But I
have to tell myself a few hundred times before the brain starts
to get that the message has changed.
I don’t need other people to confirm it. I say it enough times
and I begin to believe my own story. We place too much emphasis
on what other people think. We are concerned about how others
perceive us, but here’s the stupid part of this. We can’t see
ourselves clearly at all. We’ve created too many stories around
who we are and what we’re capable of, and what we give to the
world, to be able to see it clearly.
Start observing how you think about yourself. When you catch
yourself thinking something in the negative, write it down. For
the next week, I want you every day to write down each time you
catch yourself with a negative thought. You’ll be amazed at how
often in a day that happens.
We need to start becoming more conscious so we can choose the
life we want wisely. We will still be run by the unconscious,
but here’s the kicker, the more conscious you can become, the
better life gets. We really can re-program our brains to filter
out the negative, the rubbish, and put in the good stuff. It’s a
lot like having a cupboard full of old food stuffs. The
expiration date was months or years ago, and it’s taking up a
lot of space. Our old stories are like that. They expired a long
time ago. We need to throw them out and make room for new stuff
to enter.
When we choose our stories we choose our life.
So, I’m here to challenge you. You’ve gone through at least 50
years of living and you’ve built up a solid library of stories
that run your life. You can make all the excuses in the world
for why you’re not doing, what you could be doing, what you
don’t do, what you can’t do, and what you’d like to do if
only….. But I’m here to tell you…
There are No More Excuses… We all make choices. If the choice
you made is the wrong one, then change it again. None of us have
to be locked into the place of Now And Forever. If that were
true, then life would certainly not be worth living. I for one
do not want to be the lassie fae Leith whose mother was urged to
put me into the factory beside her so that I could learn to put
labels on whiskey bottles. If I’d done that I wouldn’t be here
today, would I.
We have all made choices that were the wrong ones. We’ve hurt
ourselves, we’ve hurt others, and we’ve limited the expression
of our true selves for many, many reasons. But we’re reached an
age where we should know that the choices we have are much more
than we’ve allowed ourselves to experience. I want you to know
that you have a choice to recreate, to redo, to explore, have an
adventure, move beyond the suffocating and limiting places that
you feel locked into. We all have choices. Many of them are
unconscious, but many of them are based on the reality of the
moment. And if you don’t like the reality, then change it.
When people say to me ‘But it’s ALWAYS been that way’ I tell
them there is no such thing as ALWAYS. There is only Until
Today.
Until today I have done it this way, but from this moment, I
can choose to do it differently. You can choose to do things
differently. It’s your life. We give so much of our lives away
to others, and the result is we usually feel used up. Women in
particular suffer from this syndrome. I’m not saying that we
can’t be of service to others. That’s a whole other issue. What
I’m saying is we can’t afford not to take care of ourselves. It
is counter-productive to living a good life.
We all want to live a good life, don’t we? I haven’t heard a
single person tell me they didn’t want a good life. We all want
better relationships with our significant others, a better job,
more money, more free time, more vacations, a better body etc.
It’s hard wired into us.
So what stops us from getting there. Our stories. The things we
tell ourselves and allow other people to tell us.
Try this exercise. It will scare the living daylights out of
you to begin with , but do it anyway. Say out loud in front of
dozens of strangers that you’re a Magnificent Woman.
Okay, so you can’t do that, then I want you to paste that
phrase where you can see it every day. Use it as a screensaver.
Remind yourself of that simple phrase and start to believe it is
true. It’s true because you told yourself it was. You’re
creating a new story. You’re changing the language of how you
speak to yourself and you’re making choices that are good for
you. Don’t let other people decide who you are. Decide for
yourself.
You’re a Fearless woman in midlife. What’s in the past is gone,
what’s here today is the beginning of the rest of your life.
It’s a cliché, I know, but it’s a very true saying. You have the
rest of your life to create the life you want. We can expect to
live another thirty to forty plus years beyond this point. Do we
really want to continue making excuses for why we are not living
the life we want?
You can create the life you want. The power is in your
decisions. And if you can’t decide for yourself, get some help.
We all try to white knuckle our way through life when all we
have to do is look around you and reach out to the people who
want to help.
Getting support is one of the greatest things you can do for
yourself. I wouldn’t be here today if I didn’t have a long list
of people who had mentored me, supported me, nurtured me and
encouraged me to be bold and live life on my own terms.
I’m not saying it’s easy. But what I will tell you is this.
There is nothing, and I mean nothing, better than feeling like
you get out of bed in the morning and you’re excited about what
the day holds, knowing you are doing exactly what you want for
yourself.
There are NO MORE EXCUSES…….
About the Author: Fearless Fifties coach and speaker Jacqueline
Wales shows you how to become the woman you were always meant to
be; how to take risks to strengthen your beliefs about who you
are and grow more confident, secure and strong as you develop
the life you want. http://www.fearlessfifties.com
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As young, vibrant, independent women, most of you like to go
out to concerts, dinner, movies, maybe even travel a little. You
also like to look your best and make an effort to get the best
make-up, grooming products, haircuts or manicures. that your
money can buy. You want to go out with friends, network with
your coworkers, take a cooking or writing class, and meet a hot
date while you’re at it. As a young woman, you have a need to
experience all the great things that life has to offer. In other
words, entertainment and personal grooming are a big part of
your life. How do you then, reconcile the added expenses that
these fun things bring against your non-existent entertainment
budget?
My advice to you is to, first and foremost, prioritize. Ask
yourself what is the one thing you cannot afford to miss every
month. Make a list of all the entertainment things you would
like to do and then go over your budget and find any extra
dollars that you can allocate every week for at least one outing
a week. If getting a weekly manicure or going to the hair salon
four times a month is more important this month than going out
to that trendy restaurant or concert, then you know what your
entertainment money will be used for. As your priorities change
every week, so should your plans for entertainment and
pampering.
Once you know how much money you can spend on personal
grooming, entertainment and miscellaneous expenses every month,
I would suggest that you take that money out of the bank and
keep it at home or with you when it’s time to go out. This will
allow you to pay for things with cash and avoid getting into
credit card debt. If, on the other hand, there is no money left
from your expenses to go out once a week, then see if you can go
out once every other week. The one week where you cannot afford
to go out, you can rent a movie, call a friend you haven’t spoke
to in a while, or read a book you have been putting aside for
some time.
I know what you may be thinking: “it sucks that I am a young,
beautiful, smart, and fun woman who wants to enjoy life and
can’t because I don’t have any money. Moreover, one outing a
week is simply not my idea of enjoying my youth. It is simply
not realistic and cannot be done.” Let me remind you that
everything is possible, especially if you set your mind to it.
When I decided to move to the United States, I picked one of the
most exciting but expensive cities in the world, New York City.
I had less than $7,000, no job, spoke very little English, and
expected the money to last for 3 years.
It sounds funny, but coming from a small town in Puerto Rico, I
didn’t know any better. When the money was gone (a mere 3 months
later), I had to get a part-time job paid $150 a week. Needless
to say, entertainment was the least of my priorities. In a city
with such cultural and artistic diversity, staying home every
week seemed to be a sin, a major punishment. I had to prepare
myself mentally for my new reality, stop dwelling on what I
didn’t have, and concentrate on the opportunities that the city
had to offer (which were many) that were available for free or
for very little money.
My point with the above story is that living within your means
is possible. You must make the best of your reality while you
work to build a better one. Keep that in mind while making your
budget and learn to take responsibility for your finances.
Remember that you are working towards goals that will eventually
improve your economic station as well as other parts of your
life.
About the Author: Jovanka Ciares is a coach, motivational
speaker and author who teaches women the skills they need to
reach their fullest potential by using the unlimited power that
lies within each of them. She’s the author of “Don’t Blame Eve”
and offers free advice on her website at
http://www.self-improvementwoman.com.
Source: http://www.isnare.com
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The latest craze is to have jewelry made of various types of
beads in different sizes, textures and colors. The more beaded
the jewelry the better it is as your outfits look gets changed
to causal.
You may buy beaded jewelry from local shops or you may make
your own by utilizing craft beads. Local craft shops namely
Michaels, AC Moore and some other have a wide selection of
superb quality and economical prices for the beads they sell. It
is unimportant if you are experienced or novice working with
beads, you can find beads, findings, wires, threads, tools and
anything else you require to make stunning jewelry and door
pieces for your home.
Craft beads may be plastic pony beads, fabric beads, paper
beads, pearl, glass to swarovski crystals and any other thing.
Shops which sell beads generally have a large collection of
thousands of various types and sizes of beads.
Some of the more popular types of craft beads include Bead
Heaven, Elegance collections, crystal Innovations, Better beads,
Elite better beads, Fancy Finery, Westrim, Blue Moon and Bead
gallery assortments. A large selection of bead and jewelry
making kits, which are just right for beginners, are also
available. These kits have everything you require including an
instructions book to get you started.
As with any craft you have to get proper tools. You may buy
them individually or in sets. If you are unsure whether you will
like to continue making things with beads and are reluctant to
invest in beginning. The alternate is you may take special
training class at the bead store. They will provide you tools to
work with and if you get interested you can than buy your own
tools for your new hobby.
The craft store can also give you many ideas for your bead
projects. It has no importance whether you take classes or work
independently with a pre-arranged kit, or if you buy a book, you
will have unlimited ideas of you own craft bead jewelry. You may
make sets which will have necklace, bracelet, earrings and pin
and each set will be totally yours which is a special kind of
jewelry.
You might have doubts whether you are talented enough to make
your own jewelry or home décor items with craft beads, but you
can know only if you try to join a class and start with small
items. As your skills improve you can try more complicated
projects.
Before you are aware, you will be making your own jewelry and
home décor items and everyone will be asking where you have
purchased your jewelry from. And you might start your own
business of making jewelry for other people to purchase. The
opportunities are endless and the limit is only your imagination
for using craft beads. You can set up our own jewelry making
business and it may turn out to be profitable venture. Since,
you are well aware that there is a great demand for handmade
products in United States of America.
About the Author: I am freelance writer, I have written on many
fields that are under the sun. Accuracy, clarity and impact are
the hallmarks of my work. I can write on any subject. More
articles at http://www.article-ghost-writer.com and
http://www.senatorinternational.co.in
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A lot of student who graduated from fashion design school
somehow has expectation of having their own fashion design
business. Some of them may want to be a designer and just want
to have own little studio then taking the job from outside, mean
while some other want to join reputable fashion design schools
or institutes or even work for the company which can pay highest
income. However, the fashion business today has more variety of
options. As the fashion business actually can be started from
very small scale like family business where one or two family
member could set up by using only little budget, to the very
large fashion items manufacturers.
There are so many business owners who are now are very
successful and are the owner of very famous fashion design
companies, and these people started their business only from
home business. However, it is fairly to say that at present
time, there will be only a little chance for the home business
to become success without having huge amount of money.
Therefore, many of graduates who finish from good fashion school
and they also paid the expensive tuition fee may not want to go
back to start his/her own home business for just to get a little
of money.
Even though the key of success seem to be the money that
designer have to invest on the business, but in fact, the most
important thing that is really keys of the success is the idea
of the design. No matter the size of the business that you have
just started, it is very important for you that you have to find
the chance to get your design out to the public and if your
design are acceptable by the market, then you will have more
work as well as possibility to expand your business.
There are so many for example of the people who just started
from very small home business but finally gain reputation from
their design and it means that you can gain reputation by doing
in the same way too!. The most effective way to present your
design items to the word it the internet. If we were in ten
years back from now, I would say that there is very least chance
for small business to compete with giant companies because there
are very limited channel for small business to present products
to public.
But now we are in internet age, where everything is possible
and the competitive advantage is no longer limited by the size
of the business at all. There are places on the internet to
present your work and also not just to present and you can sell
them on line as well. There are also many of online auction site
that you can capture the market and sell your products. It is
the place where any one who wants to sell not only fashion item
goes and present the design to people all over the world. Now it
is you decision if you are one of the people who want to start
up your fashion design career and want to gain competitive
advantage of your design.
About the Author: http://www.fashion2design.com
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The laundry pile is beginning to resemble Mount St. Helens and
you’re afraid to touch it for fear of what might jump out at
you. Your sink is overflowing with dishes caked with food two
days old. Dust bunnies are multiplying under your kitchen table
faster than you can say “hippety-hop.” You allow your home to
remain in a state of disarray for weeks until you have company
coming and then give it an eight-hour power-clean.
Sound familiar?
To a work-at-home mom, keeping the house clean may seem like an
unachievable goal. And it’s no wonder. Because you and the kids
are always home, there’s constant mess-potential. Plus, you’re
always there to see that mess, which adds to your stress-meter.
And added stress is something you just don’t need. But, let’s be
honest. Between work and the kids, cleaning is low on the
priority list. So how do you keep your house clean and still
keep doing everything else a working mom has to do?
First, cut yourself some slack. Remind yourself that people
actually live in your home and keeping it spotless is near
impossible. Be thankful you have a family to make that mess in
the first place! Not so easy to do when you’re stubbing your toe
on toys scattered on the floor, I know. But even though there
are probably times you long for a few consecutive quiet days to
yourself, admit it. You’d miss them – they’re your family!
Next, decide what areas of your house are most important to you
to keep clean. For instance, while I was growing up, my mom was
notorious for leaving dishes in the sink and lying around the
counter for a couple days at a time. I hated that! So one of the
things I make sure is done every day is the dishes. Having the
dishes done every day is something that makes me feel more on
top of things.
Your priority may be having counters or floors free of clutter,
vacuumed carpet, a sparkling bathroom or dust-free furniture.
Focus on keeping clean those areas that are most important for
you. If your priority is different from your husbands, work it
out so he is in charge of his “area” and you take care of yours.
Third, ask for help! As mentioned above, your kids and husband
live there too. It’s only fair that they do their part. If
getting your kids to pitch in is difficult, consider incentives.
A trip to the ice cream shop, a movie, cash…it’s amazing what
kids will do for a few bucks. Five-year-olds can pick up toys,
seven-year-olds can dust baseboards, ten-year- olds can help
with laundry or the dishes. Every little thing helps and lessons
your load.
If the budget allows, hire someone to deep clean your house
once a month. This will be the best money you ever spent because
it will not only free up your time but will eliminate the stress
of getting to those nasty chores you’ve been putting off for
months.
Finally, come up with a plan that works for you and your family
- whether it’s a couple of brief cleaning bursts per day, a
daily sweep of your entire home or a once-a-week thorough
cleaning.
Remember, keeping a clean house certainly has its benefits, but
the next time you trip over a toy or tackle that pile of
laundry, remind yourself that the people who live there are what
truly make up your home.
About the Author: Visit WahmZone, the ultimate community for
the Wahm and work at home mom. http://www.wahmzone.com or
http://www.wahmforums.com/
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A work-at-home mum's biggest challenge is maintaining a balance
between running her successful business and raising her
children. Who doesn't want their business to succeed? Who
doesn't want financial independence?
We want to make a difference, experience personal fulfillment
and use our skills. But we also want to be there for our
children. What we need to accept is that we can have both. Grab
the opportunity to make a huge difference in the world and to be
a great positive influence in our children's lives.
We can inspire our children to be proactive by showing them how
it's done. If we want them to experience the best of life,
accepting challenges and rewards as they arise, we can be an
example with our own lives. Show them how to live their life to
the fullest, to experience joy, fun, and personal satisfaction.
My 5 Must Do's for maintaining balance when operating your
home-based business:
Look After Your Physical Health
Balance is constantly a work in progress for a work-at-home mum
(WAHM). You need to keep in mind the basics. The first is to
take care of yourself and your health. You are not valuable to
anyone if you you haven't got good health. This means taking
care of the simple things, for example:
* Start the day with a healthy nutritional breakfast
* Exercise regularly
* Get enough sleep
If you feel rested and you're in a good frame of mind, your
productivity will be higher.
Take Time Out
Don't spend all your time running around after everyone else
and have nothing left for yourself. Make time for yourself.
Include in your schedule time to just relax and process what
needs to be done. Write a 'To Do' list and prioritise it. This
may need to be done several times during the day as different
projects arise.
Get Support
Without a support, its easy to feel overwhelmed and sometimes
isolated. Having supportive, healthy relationships is essential
for maintaining balance and creating success.
Ask for support from family and close friends. Learn to
resource support in your local area if you don't have a close
family. Find ways to reduce the energy-draining tasks in your
life. The Mum's school network is a great place to start.
Network
Moral support is just as important as physical support.
Networking with other work-at-home mums is a great form of moral
support and inspiration. It's also a great way to foster and
share ideas, hopes, and have your questions answered. You may
even be able to share your own experience and answer the
questions of other mums.
It's important to have a connection with other like-minded
mums. There are plenty of home-based business forums to join
online. Experience the mentoring and many friendships available.
Take risks
Our roles as mums are primarily to nurture, care for
and...naturally.....be cautious. Dare to challenge yourself in
your business. Set your goals high but be realistic. Allow
yourself to go higher than you ever imagined you could. The
flip side of fear is courage. Yes, it is scary out of our comfort
zone but it also presents a challenge to make a difference in
what you do in your home-based business. Express who you are and
what you believe in through work that is meaningful and
purposeful. Follow your dream, and become a better person for
the effort. The benefits of achieving your dreams and goals are
invaluable.
About the Author: Mary-Lou Halvorson is Work-At-Home mum of two
children and the creator of http://www.groovy-kids-parties.com.
She has successfully built her on-line business from home
providing Kids' Birthday Party ideas. If you would like to see
how she built her business, visit
http://www.can-work-from-home.com.
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I'd like to say from the outset that being a work-at-home mum
(WAHM) vs a work-outside-the-home mum is not that different in
terms of being organized or, for that matter, personal
fulfillment, just a few different variables - and the benefits
are many and well known. Many of the tools needed to manage both
family and career, whether that career be at home or in the
traditional workplace, overlap. However this article is
primarily focussed on the work-at-home mum and the mental
preparation that precipitates the decision to work from home.
If your dream is to be a work-at-home mum and have your own
home-based business, there are a few elements that need
considering. The first involves looking at the big picture of
your life and making some decisions - then following them
through and sticking with them.
The second is knowing what it is you want to do to create an
income to support your family. There are literally hundreds of
work-from-home possibilities - but that's probably best left for
another article....
If you're determined to make your dreams a reality it’s about
focusing on what you really want and then harnessing your own
power from within to make that happen. Visualize the path to
achieving your personal and professional goals.
Being a work-at-home mum means having and maintaining an
enthusiasm for your business matched only by your dedication to
your family. Kids are great motivators. You can make sure that
you're there for the doctor's appointments, piano lessons, and
after-school sports. You can be involved in every aspect of
their lives and juggle work and family responsibilities. It can
be done!
Often people fall into the trap of shaping their path then not
being proactive. Having a vision is one thing. Taking the
necessary actions to make it happen is another step altogether.
Having the strength of your convictions and faith in yourself
will help you attain what you want.
Know the value of creating a timetable and stick to it. It's
important to focus your energy, pace yourself, and not allow
distractions to replace that focus. Be careful not to lose
control of your schedule or allow other people's priorities
dictate where you need to be or what you need to be doing. Learn
to say 'no' and say it, if necessary.
A positive outlook is a major factor to succeeding in running
your business from home. Your attitude can really alter your
chances for success. Sometimes your frame of mind can even get
you further than your abilities! View a situation as an
opportunity instead of an obstacle and you'll maintain that flow
of productivity.
Mind over matter is paramount. You must think positively of a
situation, of others, and of course, yourself. If you approach
anything with a cynical attitude, you'll immediately create a
negative dynamic.
WAHMS can and do successfully balance working from home
together with managing their family life. In my opinion, they
actually have a competitive advantage — it broadens their
horizons on many things- and I believe that in itself pushes
them to the forefront as being better contenders for success -
both as loving, nurturing mums, as well as mums operating their
own successful business from home.
About the Author: Mary-Lou Halvorson is a Work-At-Home mum of
two children, and the creator of
http://www.groovy-kids-parties.com. Mary-Lou has successfully
built her own on-line business from home, providing ideas for
Kids' Birthday Parties. To see how Mary-Lou built her website,
visit http://www.can-work-from.com.
Source: http://www.isnare.com
Permanent Link:
http://www.isnare.com/?aid=185181&ca=Womens+Interest
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